The World

“About thirty years ago, the Government screwed us over…”

The Resistance Recruitment Song

Rawling City

Rawling City is located somewhere on the East Coast of the country. I can’t tell you which state, since President Star combined everything shortly before I was born, but it’s got mountains on one side and the ocean on the other, so – use your imagination.

And though the term “city” might make you think of a bustling civilization with towering skyscrapers and a lively night scene, Rawling and its surrounding area are best described as, “small town”.

Maybe it’s the wide streets with small buildings on either side? Maybe it’s the fact that you could drive through the whole city in less than five minutes? But, more than likely, it’s the fact that no resident of Rawling City could walk more than a few blocks before running into someone they’ve known for ten years.

That’s even more true now since President Star took over and the population of the city was cut in half – but we’ll get to that.

The People

The minute the Government took over, the people of the country and Rawling City were sent to hell – and they’ve yet to return. During the day, they keep their heads down and avoid the attention of Patrolers (President Star’s army of informants and enforcers) while doing the jobs they were forced into.

Whether there was some master plan behind assigning people random jobs, or he simply didn’t care, President Star had everyone in the country draw from a hat to pick their new career. Doctors became plumbers, dog walkers became doctors, and those who drew the dreaded “social media influencer” were promptly thrown in jail.

When I turned eighteen, I drew the Grocery Store Clerk position, which was good for me cause I didn’t want to take my work home with me. (RIP all those who drew School Teacher)

Though I wasn’t around to witness the take over, our parents had mentioned that no one really threw a fit. It all happened so fast, and suddenly there were Patrolers in every town, city, and small towns that were called cities overnight. No one had time to react. At least, not right away.

The Government

The Government smells, and so do all who work for it. They’re just a bunch of smelly farts who can’t stand the fact that people don’t love them. Well, guess what, you dictator wannabes? We’d love you a lot more if you hadn’t taken us all hostage!

Actually, that might not be true. My parents did mention that before President Star took power, no one was a big fan of the Government. And those who were generally had a change of heart about every four to eight years. But I digress. Back to the topic at hand:

Suck it, President Star – cause you suck – and we hate you. If you think I’m gonna dedicate an entire section of this website to your pathetic history – THINK AGAIN!

Instead, here’s a list of all the grievances we have against you:

  • You smell (as previously mentioned)
  • You killed my parents (though you didn’t actively pull the trigger, you’re still getting blamed for this)
  • You took away our vegetables (not that I ate a ton of these – but still – dick move)
  • You’re performing human experiments on the citizens of this country! (Elise has demanded that I list this as ‘uncomfirmed’ but it’s totally true)
  • Also, you smell

The Resistance

Here come the big guns! The show stoppers! Led by one of the coolest sisters of one of the coolest radio hosts in this country (aka me): I’m talkin’ about the Resistance, baby!

The Resistance was formed by a small group of citizens in a charming little town called, you guessed it, Rawling City. My parents were some of the founding members. Though they were few in number, they did their best to disrupt the Government’s power in Rawling and free its people from President Star’s grasp.

Unfortunately, they were all captured, and when they yelled out to the rest of the town to rise up, band together, and fight for themselves – no one answered the call. They were executed by firing line.

But enough about our sad and boring history! Let’s look at the Resistance today!

My sister, Hen, about ten years after the first Resistance was crushed, took up the reigns, grouped some people together and formed the Resistance (not to be confused with the previous group of revolutionaries that went by the same title). And that’s essentially how Rawling City lost half its population overnight. I wanted to join too, but I got this thing with my leg. I just can’t run very far, so I wouldn’t be much use to them, you know?

Anyway, though Hen is the leader, she helped the group form a council to vote on all revolutionary matters, such as where they would attack next and what kind of food they serve at meetings. They haven’t done a lot yet (bureaucracy, am I right?), but I’m sure they’ll strike the Government hard any day now!

Disclaimer: This entire website is dedicated to a fictional podcast about fictional people. Any resemblance to actual people is completely unintentional, and you might just be projecting.

Also, since you made it this far down the page, follow us on social media!